Monday, 3 September 2007
I do, I do I do I do I do I do
This post is more of a question than an answer, I suppose. When one is asked the question "Do you have any chocolate hobnobs in your pants?", the standard English is usually a variation on: "I have" or "I haven't".
But recently I have found myself slipping into the Americanised "I do" or "I don't". The question is, should I avoid this for purely xenophobic reasons, or is it grammatically incorrect? The problem is that I'm not strictly sure if "I do" is incorrect. My somewhat loose theory is that it is incorrect, because the question is based around the verb to have, not to do, with "do" in this context being an idiosyncratic English alternative to the "have you any chocolate hobnobs" style of question.
The problem comes when you look at the sentence "Do you like eating chocolate hobnobs through a porcelain straw?". If you answered "I do", it would sound correct. If you answered "I like", you'd sound like Borat.
Thoughts please.
posted by Tom at 8:17 pm
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7 Comments:
Have you been drinking? I think you've got yourself tied up in knots. "I do" is surely the correct response to any question beginning with "do you...?". In the same way, "I will/won't" follows, "will you...?" and "I would/wouldn't" follows "would you...?".
Although weddings would be more amusing if the groom answered the question, "Do you take this woman...?" by grunting, "I take!", then bashed his bride over the head and dragged her up to his tree-house for a rough and thoughtless consummation.
To be followed by a buffet and everyone dancing in a sweaty circle to Come on Eileen.
"Toora Loora Toora Loo-Rye-Aye!"
I take your point, although I suspect you have been drinking. I swear I've heard Americans respond to 'Have you got...' with 'I do'. Perhaps that is the construction that's been confusing me. I'm confused!
I am an American, so I thought I would comment. It may be that Americans are confused by questions that begin, "Have you got..." because we do not begin questions that way over here. An American would not say, "Have you got 5 monkeys?" It would be, "Do you have 5 monkeys?" And wouldn't "I do" be an appropriate response to that? I guess I think of it as an abbreviated version of "Yes, I do have 5 monkeys."
Thanks for the laughs, guys. I agree with Leah and Gez regarding the "I do" issue.
As for the other thing, in the US, it would be a sit-down dinner of lemon chicken, followed by everyone dancing a conga line to Kool and the Gang's "Celebration."
Also, in the US, the correct answer to "Do you have any chocolate hobnobs in your pants?" is not "I have" or "I haven't" but "What the HECK is a chocolate hobnob?"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HobNob
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