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Wednesday 26 December 2007

Grammar Abuse in Signage – Xmas Special

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I don't know about you but I'm full; I mean really full. And I'm drunk; I mean really drunk. I've been this way for two days now and I'm not looking forward to the aftermath. The ancient Romans used to gorge themselves like this every week, can you imagine? Of course they had the added fun of bisexual orgies and recreational bulimia to keep the appetite up and to add an extra level of entertainment. There has been no puking or "breaking in" of house-boys so far but I had a good haul of presents this year and so I can't really complain.

In a way, we should thank the Romans for our annual excuse to eat and drink too much. If they hadn't got uppity with a certain beardy upstart and seen fit to nail him to a cross we would have never had cause to celebrate his birth.

Still, I'll never forgive them for crucifying Santa.

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank you, dear readers, for the support since GrammarBlog launched only 8 months ago. We're planning a few changes in the near future, all for your benefit, and I hope you will continue to enjoy reading the blog as much as we enjoy writing it. A special thank you goes out to all those who have contributed and commented, please continue to do so.

Before I have to get back to drunkenly rowing with relatives and falling asleep in front of Indiana Jones I have just enough time to present to you the entries for our Grammar Abuse in Signage Xmas special. (I really regret using 'Xmas'. I was kind of joking when I did so but every time I write it, a part of my soul dies – which is less than ideal.)

So without further ado, here they are – starting with the winning entry.

The fabulously monikered Garrett Coakley sent this in and writes, "This is the pub across the road from my flat on the London Road in Oxford. Depressingly this is the same sign from last year and they still haven't noticed. The place is a bit of a hole anyway, you can guarantee there will be a fight outside every Friday and Saturday evening."

Garrett receives 100 shiny Xmas GrammarBlog points for his submission. They're in the post.

Here are the best of the rest:

This was submitted by Julie but spotted by her son, aged eight. Julie did not say whether or not the boy had his photo "took" with Santa.

Sent in by Daniel. Quotation marks for emphasis should get you added to the naughty list. I also like the way the alphabet theme is abandoned at XYZ.

Alden spotted this at his local grocery store.

Oops, lookes like the marketing department at Home Depot was in a bit of a hurry to get this marketing email out.

From Francis.

From Martin in Glasgow.

The Smiths' what?

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Labels: signage, Xmas

posted by Gez at 10:10 am

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4 Comments:

Tom said...: If Morrissey ever contemplated a Smiths Christmas single (and you know, the contrary old nonce probably considered it), this would have been the cover.; 28 December 2007 at 22:43
Unknown said...: Ooh! Hey! There's one of my photos here! It's strange reading a post on a site and then finding one of your photos on it.; 29 December 2007 at 01:29
garrettc said...: Ooo, I won! And you spelt my name wrong *:) It's "Coakley", not "Croakley" (no r).

But thank you, I'll be sure to wander over to the pub to tell them; 2 January 2008 at 23:41
Anonymous said...: Did you notice those alphabet people are selling KIDS?; 4 January 2008 at 17:27